Hey Reader,
A month ago, I downloaded the How We Feel app from Yale’s Center for Emotional Intelligence. I thought it might be interesting. What I didn’t expect was that it would quietly shift the way I show up, especially at work.
I’m a fairly grounded person. I work in emotionally charged environments, facilitate important conversations, and coach leaders through difficult decisions. I thought I had a pretty good handle on how I felt throughout the day.
Turns out, I was wrong.
What I learned quickly is that I don’t always recognize how I’m feeling in the moment, until I stop to consciously name it.
And when I started doing that regularly, a pattern emerged: I tend to hang out in what the app calls the pleasant but low energy zone. Most often, I’d label my emotions as calm, understood, compassionate, balanced. Not a bad place to be.
But then came the spikes...moments when the calm slipped. And when I paused to name what I was feeling, the words came: overwhelmed, frustrated, nervous.
What surprised me most was what happened next.
Once I gave the emotion a name, it started to lose its grip. The overwhelm faded. The frustration softened. The tension lightened.
There’s real power in naming your emotions. It creates just enough distance to stop reacting and start responding.
Reader, we all like to think we make rational decisions at work. But the truth is, emotion is always in the room. It shapes our tone, our timing, and even the choices we make when no one’s watching.
Here’s what happens when we don’t label our emotions:
- We confuse tired with disengaged
- We mistake nervousness for lack of readiness
- We interpret frustration as failure
But when we do name them, we unlock a layer of clarity. It becomes easier to:
- Ask for what we need
- Choose the right response
- Show up with more authenticity and intention
Try this...
You don’t need an app (though I recommend How We Feel!)—just a moment of mindfulness and a willingness to check in.
I'm not gonna lie...it's hard at first to pause in the moment and recognize your emotions (even with an app reminding you).
Here’s a simple framework to start using throughout your workday:
- Pause: Set an alarm on your phone or watch, and when it goes off, notice emotion in the moment. Maybe your heart races before a meeting, or you’re staring blankly at your screen, or you are in a state of flow.
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Label: Ask yourself, What exactly am I feeling right now?
- Try to go beyond "good" or "bad."
- Use specific terms like irritated, curious, peaceful, discouraged.
- Locate: Where is this showing up in your body?
- Learn: What might this feeling be trying to tell you?
- Leverage: Decide what you need next—do you need to speak up, take a walk, clarify something, or simply breathe?
This isn’t about getting soft.
It’s about getting smart.
Emotional clarity leads to better decision-making, stronger relationships, and more resilience at work.
And if you're someone who leads others, your ability to name and navigate your own emotions gives people permission to do the same. That’s leadership in action.
Take two minutes after your next meeting to check in. What did you feel? How did it shape your tone, your questions, your decisions? Write it down. Over time, these moments of awareness will add up and they’ll transform the way you lead.
And when you are ready, listen to our latest episode of Leaderish: Leadership lessons straight up, where we dig into Emotional Intelligence. Click the player below.
And if you want to WATCH it...we released our first YouTube Episode. I'd be super grateful if you'd check it out! Give it a like and subscribe. It sure would help us to train the algorithm.
Latest Podcast Episode
Check out the latest episode from the Leaderish Podcast! We share leadership lessons, straight up! You'll find great content to help you grow in your career.
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A Little Bit About Regina
I'm Regina Taute (say Howdy Taute and you've pronounced it right) a seasoned talent leader with experience in leadership and organizational development. I started Collective Growth Coaching and Consulting to partner with organizations to develop wildly practical and effective talent strategies. As a credentialed coach and certified in MBTI and Hogan assessments, my passion lies in unlocking potential and driving sustainable growth by helping individuals and teams thrive in today’s evolving business world.
It would be my honor to join you for a complimentary 30-minute coaching session to help solve a current challenge with wildly practical solutions or to meet with you one-on-one to chat and get to know you.
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